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Time Enough and Space: A Firefly/Doctor Who Crossover AU - chapter 2
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Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5
Mal shoved at Jayne to get him moving upstairs. The Doctor put his hand on River's back, and together they climbed the stairs, followed by Zoe. Simon fell in step with Donna. "When and where are you from?" he asked.
"Earth, twenty-first century," Donna said, giving him a bright smile, and staying just a little too close as they walked.
Ever minding his manners, Simon smiled back. "I'm from what you would consider the fifty-fourth," he told her, very quietly. "I was born on a planet called Trethos Three."
"That sounds familiar to me," Donna mused. "I don't think we've been there, but I'm sure he's yammered on about it at some point. They don't know, do they?"
"No. I imagine you're going to find out why very shortly." He let Donna step down into the mess first, and looked across to the Doctor and River before he went to join them.
"Well, Simon?" Mal still looked grumpy, having resumed the spot he vacated after dinner. "You wanna kindly tell us what the hell is going on?"
River sat next to the Doctor, legs tugged up against her chest, arms wrapped around them. "He tells me stories," she told the Doctor. "Keeps away the monsters."
"What sorts of stories?" the Doctor asked, curiously.
"The childhood we didn't have together," Simon said. "I've been passing her off as my sister since... since we got here. And the accident."
"I'm confused, and you've only just started talking," Wash said slowly. "Passing her off as your sister? Does that mean she's not?"
"No," said Simon. He peered down the table at Wash. "She's really not. She's..."
"A Time Lady," said the Doctor. "She's like me--well, except for the lady part. Obviously. We're both from long ago and far away--a planet called Gallifrey. That was an unfortunate rhyme, and I do apologise. Well, not really. I rather liked the way it came out."
"Wait. A planet called what?" Mal demanded. "If someone doesn't start making some sense I'm going to get cranky."
"Crankier, I'd say," said the Doctor, voicing a thought Simon wasn't nearly brave enough to say. "Simon, I think you need to start at the beginning."
"What's a Gallifrey?" Jayne asked. "No such planet as that, not in the 'verse."
"It's not in your 'verse," the Doctor said.
"The Alliance has been lying to you for a very long time," Simon said. "Kept you cut off from so much out there."
"What do you mean, lying to us?" Kaylee asked. "You say that like you're not one of us."
"I'm not, Kaylee," Simon said, gently as he could.
Jayne snorted. "Right, you're an alien."
"So am I," said the Doctor. "And River."
There was a long, silent pause.
"Aliens aren't real," Wash said, very slowly, like he was talking to a lot of crazy people.
Donna snorted. Loudly. "Oh, that's cute. That's really so cute. Do they not know?" she asked, looking at the Doctor. "That's adorable!"
"Their government has been lying to them for a very long time," the Doctor explained to them. "This is a particular offshoot of humanity that's hidden itself away since they left Earth, apart from the rest of the universe, even other humans, to keep themselves pure and free of alien influence." He looked at Simon again. "What year were you born?"
"Fifty-three sixty-eight," Simon replied without a pause, without thought, in a heartbeat. It actually felt good to say that out loud. "On Trethos Three."
"Ah, a Trethosian!" the Doctor crowed. "You'd love the Trethosian system, Donna, I'll have to take you there someday. On Trethos Three, there are beaches where--"
"The sand is red," said Simon. "Combine that with a binary sunset and it's like the oceans are on fire."
"I do love a beach," Donna said. She looked at everyone else, and Simon found himself following suit. They all looked either stunned or confused. "Not sure they believe you boys."
"If someone doesn't start making some sense," Mal said, slowly, "I'm going to shoot one of you."
Simon thought this was a not-unexpected amendment to Mal's earlier statement. "Right," he said. He looked at River, at the table, then over at Mal. "I'll start from the beginning."
Simon looked around the crowded yard of his parents' estate and contemplated making a break for it. He never really liked parties and he liked them even less now because his parents were so eager to marry him off that it bordered on a horrifying sort of desperation. There was a gleam in the eyes of many of the young women there. He really wanted to avoid said gleam. It made him feel like a piece of meat.
He was a young, handsome doctor--even Simon had to grudgingly admit it made him so very eligible. But bachelorhood suited him and he was in no rush to get married.
Music sounded from speakers mounted high on poles; the band was almost entirely obscured by the partygoers. Simon sighed, picked up a glass of champagne from a passing server, and started to wind his way through the crowd. He nodded to some people, smiled, paused every now and then. If his mother looked for him, it might even appear that he was socialising.
He found his way to an unoccupied bench at one far corner of the garden and sat down, sipping his champagne. His eyes lit on a beautiful young woman with long, flowing dark hair, who danced just at the edge of the crowd. She seemed to be alone and had caught rather a lot of attention. Simon watched her with a smile. After a moment, he realised that he very much hoped that perhaps he could catch her eye when the song ended.
Now wasn't that something?
There was applause when the music ended, and the dancer laughed, holding her skirt out to the side and curtseying low. She moved away from the dance floor, breathing hard and fanning at her face. She made her way to the refreshments table.
Simon got up, wiped a sweaty palm on his trousers, and approached her. "Hi," he said, "I'm Simon Tam. Can I... get you anything?"
"Simon... I believe this is your party, isn't it?" She said, smiling at him and offering her hand. "Call me River. I was just looking for a drink."
He took her hand, just long enough to be a gentleman. "Yeah, the party's for me. The refreshment table's just this way." He guided her the rest of the way. "My parents are hoping I'll fall in love and get married.
"All in one night? That's a lot to expect from one party," River said, letting Simon lead the way.
"That's what I tried to explain." Simon glanced over his shoulder, just to make sure neither of his parents were nearby, or any aunts, uncles, or cousins, then added, "I have been trying to plot my daring escape."
"What have you come up with so far?" she asked, grinning at him.
"Well, I was thinking about creating some sort of diversion and then disappearing through the crowd," Simon said. "Or sneaking back in through the house and out the front door to find a hovercab. Or maybe just walking out the garden gates and going for a long walk."
"I like the third option," River said. "A long walk in the fresh air. It would do you good, before you find your true love and get married in one night."
"That one was actually my favourite," Simon said. "There's some amazing plant life around here that I never get tired of looking at."
"Excellent," she said, offering him her arm. "Shall we?"
He laughed. "I think we shall." He deposited his champagne glass on a small table, then waltzed all the way out of the yard with River on his arm. There was a part of him that thought he really ought to be more careful; he didn't know her. People could make a rather large ransom off of someone like Simon and his family.
On the other hand? Simon never took risks. And maybe it was the birthday--technically tomorrow--which spurred him into the risk-taking. Or maybe it was her smile, or her eyes, or her hair, or just having watched her dance.
They walked for nearly two hours, arm-in-arm, and talked about everything and nothing. She was sweet, and funny, and smart--able to keep up with him on any subject he wanted to discuss.
They paused, after a time. It was getting dark. They sat together, in their finery, on the cool grass. Simon thrust his hands out behind him to support himself as he looked up at the stars. "I always wanted to travel," he said. "I know what's out there, but I've seen so little of it. The furthest I've ever been is Trethos Four."
"Why don't you?" River asked. "You're so young. You should travel. See the stars."
"Work. Commitments," Simon said, with a little sigh. "It's hard to get away."
"Not really," she said. And she smiled. "I could take you with me right now."
He looked at her. "You have a spaceship?" There was a hodgeberry bush right behind him. His fingers were itching. Just for a few. Oh, what the hell--he'd already run away from his own birthday party. He reached back and plucked the berries from the bush and popped a few into his mouth.
She smiled again. "Uh huh."
"Really? You're not joking?" He offered her some of the berries.
She took the berries from him, ate them, then shook her head. "I'm a traveller, Simon. That's what I do."
"That's--what you do? You just travel?" He looked delighted by this proposition.
"In space," she said, then leaned in closer to whisper. "And time."
He blinked, then started laughing. "You're making fun of me!"
"Oh, Simon Tam, I really am not," she said, shaking her head. "Ask me where I'm from."
"Where are you from?" he asked.
"Gallifrey," she whispered.
"Gallifrey..." He frowned. He'd heard that name, somewhere. Somehow. Maybe? He couldn't be sure, honestly. He was about to ask for clarification when there was a sudden shout.
It was Tom, the Cambersons' groundskeeper. Simon laughed and got to his feet, reaching for River's hand. "We'd better get moving," he said. "I don't think the groundskeeper would hesitate to thrash me even if I am taller than him now."
"Come on, then--that way," River said, pointing with one hand as she took his in the other.
"Where are we going?" he asked, even as he started a brisk walk in the direction she pointed.
She laughed and tugged his hand. "Come on--faster!"
"River, where are we going?" Simon asked, again, just a brief moment later.
"My ship, of course," she said. "Hurry--you don't want a thrashing, do you? That'd be embarrassing at your age."
"What ship?" Simon asked as he looked around eagerly. "I don't see any ships!"
"Well of course you don't," River said, very reasonable for someone who was jogging away from an old man with a garden implement. "You don't know how to look yet."
"I... have no idea what you're talking about." He started losing faith in his initial assessment of her. Maybe she was mad.
She looked over her shoulder one more time, then stopped all of a sudden and tugged a key from around her neck. "Come on!"
"Maybe it's time for me to go back to my party," he said.
"Maybe it is," she said. "But first, come with me. Then if you want to go back? I'll take you back," she promised. And then she turned and unlocked the door to the tiny garden shed that was in the middle of the lawn, pushed the door open, and stepped inside. "Coming?"
He stared at her. Blinked a few times. Then looked just beyond her shoulder--wait. Something wasn't right here. He took a tentative step into the shed. Then immediately stepped back out. "What. I don't. What..."
And back inside he went. "This is... this isn't possible," he said.
River's laughter came from deep inside the little shed. "Isn't it?"
"It's huge," he said. "It was just a shed--but it's got all of this inside it. River--this is a different dimension, isn't it? All of this, done up to look like a little shed?" He finally closed the door behind him. He could hear the groundskeeper shouting again.
"Something like that, yes," River said, looking very pleased. "You're very clever, Simon. I don't meet many people like you."
"I read a lot." That tended to be Simon's answer to a lot of things. How did you know that? Why don't you have more friends? When was the last time you got some sun?
"Don't you want to see some things for yourself, instead of just reading about it?" River leaned against a piece of piping then twirled herself around it. "I can show you. I can take you anywhere. Anywhen."
"Anywhere." Simon took a few tentative steps toward the round console in the middle of the room. His eyes went past it. There were doors. So many doors. His brain told him they were on the bridge. In through the wooden shed doors, and right onto the bridge. All light blue-grey. His fingers itched to pull a lever on the console. He looked at River again. "Anywhen."
"And when you're ready to come home, I bring you back right here, right now, with the gardener outside shouting at us for eating his berries. So. What do you think?" she asked, smiling at Simon. "Can I show you the universe, Simon Tam?"
He didn't have any of his things. Not even an extra pair of socks. He looked at her for a moment, then nodded slowly.
Show him the universe. Bring him right back to his twenty-fourth birthday. Back to his parents, back to the girls who wanted to marry Dr Tam--one of the top surgeons in Capital City. Back to his life.
"Show me the universe," he said.
Simon fell quiet. He looked only at the Doctor. He could feel everyone else's eyes on him and couldn't make himself look at them. He knew they must all think he was absolutely insane.
"Okay. So. Let me see if I've got this right," Wash said after the silence became nearly unbearable. He held up a finger for each point. "You're from another solar system. You're an alien. And River's not actually your sister." He turned to look at Zoe. "Actually, that last one explains a whoooooole lot."
"That it surely does," Zoe agreed, looking down the table at Simon.
For his part, Simon managed to blush just a little. "That's right. I'm from another solar system. In the future. And I'm an alien. River and I travelled in her space ship for... a long time. Days turned into weeks, turned into months, turned into years. I left everything I owned behind."
"It's not as mad as it sounds," Donna said. "'Course, I suppose it depends on what you've got to leave behind," she admitted. "Wow. Anyone else feeling a little awkward here, or is it just me?"
"More than a little awkward," said Kaylee, quietly.
No one said anything else for another few agonisingly long moments.
"Well, Simon." The Doctor had lowered his voice, too. "Finish telling us your story."
Simon and River stepped out the TARDIS doors and onto a broad, green field. Beyond a little rise in the land was a forest. When Simon glanced over his shoulder, he smiled upon seeing that the TARDIS now looked like a rickety old shed--so run-down in appearance that it looked like a stiff breeze might knock her over.
"Looks like we've landed pretty far from civilisation," Simon commented.
"What gave it away?" she said wryly, reaching for his hand. "Come on. Exploring to be done."
"Yes, ma'am." Simon grinned at her. "Maybe there's a quaint little village just beyond that ridge."
"Would I take you to a deserted planet with nothing exciting to do or see?"
"Only that one time, and that was because that ionic storm threw us off-course."
"Right... the planet of bugger all," she said, sighing loudly. "That was disappointing."
"There was that bird's nest we found, though," Simon pointed out.
"How many do you have now?"
"Last I checked the lab," Simon said with a grin, "there's seventeen."
"Did you put the one back that turned out to be sentient?"
"Yeah. It kept trying to eat my fingers."
"I once brought home a beautiful rock, and it turned out to be a dinosaur," River told him.
Simon stopped dead in his tracks. "A dinosaur? An honest-to-God dinosaur?"
"A raptor, as it turned out."
"Did you end up putting it back where you found it?"
"No, I kept it. It watches over you in the library. Just make sure that you don't eat red meat right before bed," River said, trudging up the hill.
"How did I never notice that there's a raptor in the library?"
"You're always reading," she said. "You lose your shoes in there, I hardly think you'd notice a raptor."
"Maybe the raptor is taking my shoes, then putting them back when I return to look for them."
"No, that'd be the pixies."
"I knew it!" he exclaimed. "I knew there were pixies, and you kept denying it. One of these days, Time Lady or no... I'll get you back for the way you tease me."
"Okay," River said, patting his hand. "You do that."
He gave her a mock-glare, then picked up the pace a bit to make it over the ridge and to the forest. When he passed between the first two trees, he stopped again.
"River?" he said, in a soft whisper. "Is it just me or--is the forest singing?"
"It's not just you," she murmured back. A few moments of listening, and she smiled, looking delighted. "Come on," she said, tugging his hand. "Come, we need to get closer."
Simon followed along and marvelled. It was wonderful that there were still things in all of time and space that could make him marvel. But he had only been travelling with River for a few years, and surely hadn't seen even a tiny fraction of what all of time and space had to offer.
The forest was singing. Simon looked around, to make absolutely certain that there weren't creatures sitting up in the trees making that sweet, lovely music. He spotted a few animals darting about, but he was certain it wasn't them. It was the forest itself; every tree that formed the vibrant green canopy overhead.
Another few moments, and he reached out with his free hand, tentative and a little afraid to break the spell, and he laid his palm against the trunk of the nearest tree. It vibrated, just a little, the same way a human's--or humanoid's--throat might if you touched it while he or she (or other) spoke.
"River." Simon looked at her, wide-eyed in wonder, but he didn't know what to say.
She smiled at him, and touched her index finger to her lips. She tugged on his hand again, led him to a clearing in the middle of a grove of trees, and sat down on the ground. She placed one hand against the forest floor, then the other, and waited for him to do the same.
He sat facing her, looked down, and put his hands on the forest floor. If at all possible, his eyes grew even wider. The very earth beneath them vibrated, just as the tree had. Finally, he looked at River.
He'd thought he had purpose in his life. He was a surgeon; he saved lives. He'd re-attached a girl's leg. He'd kept patients alive who, under other hands, would never have survived. He was medical elite; he'd been given so much recognition and reward for his work. Never had he thought how small his life really was.
She had shown him so much. So many amazing things. So many terrifying things. But each and very one of them was a wonder. She held his hand, guided him, protected him--his Time Lady, the one person in all the stars he loved the most.
She'd never know. She was so far beyond him.
River's eyes were closed the entire time, an expression of pure joy on her face as the music moved right through her. She was The Dancer, after all.
Simon's throat felt tight. He closed his eyes, listened, felt. He wasn't even aware of the fact that there were tears slipping down his cheeks.
After awhile, she couldn't sit still any longer, so she stood up and started to move, letting the music guide her. She slipped off her boots and danced barefoot, face toward the sky, hair streaming.
He looked up and watched her, still either entirely oblivious or uncaring about his silent crying. She was beautiful. He'd never seen anyone quite so perfect. He resolved--not for the first time--that he was never going to leave her. They'd travel together forever.
He knew she could have danced forever. She likely wasn't sure how long it was before she finally dropped back down again, panting for breath.
He opened his mouth to speak, but the words died on his tongue. He looked in her eyes for a moment, then darted his gaze away. She reached out for his hand and gave it a squeeze.
Maybe it was okay that there were no words. Maybe they didn't need them. Ducking his head, Simon closed his eyes again. But he did squeeze her hand in return.
The TARDIS' chameleon circuit had disguised it as a bright red tent. They had landed about a mile from the edge of the beach. Simon began walking faster as soon as it came into sight. He hurried inside, and leaned against the door. He was sure River knew he'd snuck out in the middle of the night. They'd intended to stay for a few days.
Simon had wanted to have a good time. People more or less his own age, young, enjoying life, music, dancing. Sex.
And he couldn't. All he could think about was River. He let his head thunk back against the TARDIS door, eyes closed.
River.
"Simon?"
He jumped, guiltily, and then opened his eyes to look at her. "Hi," he said.
"Sorry... you were thinking loudly," she said.
"I--" He blushed furiously. "You're not that telepathic," he said, defensively.
"No," she said. "But I can tell when you're thinking hard."
"Oh," he said. "Right."
"You left," she said. "But you came back."
"I was gone for a while," he admitted. "I went... I went dancing."
"I like when you dance," she said. "Did you have fun?"
He nodded. "Yeah. I did, for a while."
"But you came back."
Another nod. "Yeah. I did. I'd wanted--I'd wanted--but I couldn't."
She frowned. "Do you want to go?" she said softly.
"Go where?" he asked.
"Is this the part where you leave?"
"I don't want to leave," he said. "I can't leave--that's why I came back."
She frowned even more. "You left, because you don't want to leave, and that's why you came back?"
"Yes," he said. He knew how insane that sounded. He really didn't care.
"I want you to stay. You know that, right? I... I really want you to stay."
"I told you I'd be with you forever. I'll always be here. You're... everything."
"Do you mean it? Really mean it?"
"Yes, River." He finally stepped away from the door. "I mean it. I could never leave you, the TARDIS, and our life."
She moved quickly and wrapped around him in a big hug. Almost too tight.
He put his arms around her, one hand on the back of her head and the other on the small of her back. "I love you," he whispered. "I know you can't--you don't--but I love you so much."
She closed her eyes and held on. "I need you to stay," she whispered, and Simon knew.
It wasn't just him. It was never just him. She just didn't know what to do about it any more than he did.
Simon took a deep breath. "I lived with River on her TARDIS for years. The two of us, a miniature velociprator named Chip who thought I was his mother, and some pixies who would steal my shoes.
"She showed me all of time and space that I wanted to see, and parts of both she thought I'd like to see. And sometimes we just stayed on the TARDIS. I never wanted for anything.
"Until--" Simon frowned, paused, looked down at the table for a moment before continuing. "I'm still young. I'd been with River for about six years, give or take. Things like years sort of lost all meaning after a while. Trethosians have an expected lifespan of about two centuries. I suddenly realised that I wasn't exactly a hundred and fifty. I was--am--young. I should have been having fun with people my own age. I'd gone on a grand total of six dates before I met River and I hardly had any friends.
He was quiet a moment longer. The entire table seemed to have been put on pause. No one--no one at all--said anything, and Simon was painfully aware of everyone watching them. He could imagine impatience on Mal and Jayne's faces; skepticism on Wash and Zoe's; patience mixed with that skepticism from Inara and Book; hurt on Kaylee's.
He never wanted to hurt Kaylee.
"We'd fallen in love. Time Lords--Gallifreyans--don't reproduce sexually, but that doesn't preclude... but everything was so complicated. I'd live for at least another hundred and fifty years, barring accident or illness. But River--she was as good as immortal. Nothing really changed between us, but maybe we'd hold hands longer. Or she'd curl up with me on the chaise in the library while I read. We knew that everything had changed, and yet so little actually had. She was still my dancer. My forever.
"When you've seen all of time and space, when you've seen stars born and die or a planet in stages of development from a stone age to space travel, when you've seen beauty so profound it makes your heart ache, when you've suddenly found yourself in the middle of a revolution and rubbed elbows with artists and scientists and generals from dozens or hundreds of worlds--" Simon shook his head. Time to end that sentence. "When you've seen all of those things, there's no going back."
"You never went back, did you?" It was Inara who spoke up, her voice very soft, carefully neutral, as it usually was. Her voice betrayed nothing. Her eyes, focused on Simon, said everything. "Never went home."
He looked at her, then shook his head. "Not once. It's not as though I never thought about it, but I just couldn't."
Inara nodded, just once. "Please... go on," she said.
"And then River got a message from Gallifrey." Simon clasped his hands together on the table; so tight they hurt. "She sat me down and told me that she'd worked hard, as hard as she could, to keep me away from the Daleks. She said that I should never have had to know what a Dalek was." He looked at the Doctor again; he wondered if the haunted look he saw in the Doctor's eyes was reflected in his own. "But she taught me about them the way she'd taught me about things I never could have really learned in school, and she told me that the Time Lords were going to war with the Daleks.
"River had been recalled to fight in the war. That meant returning me to my life. The monotony of work and home and attempted socialisation. I always failed more or less miserably at that part. But then she gave me another option. The TARDIS' Chameleon Arch."
The Doctor was absolutely still and absolutely quiet. His gaze shifted from Simon to River; to Donna; back to Simon. They watched each other once again.
"A Chameleon Arch," Simon said, for the benefit of Serenity's crew, "can change every cell in someone's body. The TARDIS' databanks would provide all of the physical and historical information to change River into a Trethosian. Her Gallifreyan self would be stored. But she'd be Trethosian. She'd be able to hide. I'd know the truth, enough of it, but we'd be together."
"Bigger on the inside," River whispered, hands fluttering over her chest. "So, so much bigger on the inside."
Simon looked at her and reached for her hand. "So much bigger," he echoed in a whisper.
"Are you sure it's safe?" Simon looked entirely unconvinced. "Couldn't we just--run?" He hovered over River, worried, concerned, and possibly feeling just a little sick to the stomach.
"There's nowhere to run," she said. "Nowhere in space or time that they won't find me. I've been recalled, Simon. All of us, every one. The only way they won't find me is if I'm no longer one of them."
He reached for her, turned her around to face him, and took hold of her hands. "You promise me. You have to promise me you'll be all right. That you'll still be my dancer."
"I promise," River whispered, looking up into his eyes. "I promise, Simon. This is our chance. This is our freedom."
He looked back down at her for a long, long moment, then leaned in and kissed her.
Even after all this time, he'd never kissed her, and it surprised even him that he did it. When he looked back, his own eyes were very wide.
River's fingers came up, and she touched her lips, then smiled at him. "If we do this, we can have everything," she told him. "I'll be like you. We'll be the same. Simon, it's worth it."
He nodded. "Yes," he said, "you're right. You're always right. I love you."
She smiled again. "The next time you kiss me, I'll be able to love you, like you love me. Please, Simon. It's time."
"I'm still afraid," he said, though he nodded.
"I know," she said. "Trust me?"
"Forever."
"But it went wrong," Simon said. He spoke loud enough for everyone to hear, but he still held River's hand and he watched her. "It wasn't completed properly. Something found her TARDIS. I didn't recognise it--it opened fire--I was never very good at flying the TARDIS, but I got us away.
"The only problem was, I got us here, and too close to an Alliance cruiser. They had no idea what the TARDIS was, and they gave chase. I don't know how I managed it, but I landed the TARDIS on a planet, where I was able to hide my key. If we went back to the planet, I could find it." It made him feel sick to add, "But the Alliance has River's TARDIS."
"But she can change back, Simon," the Doctor said. "All you need is the watch."
Simon swallowed hard. "It's on the TARDIS."
"Ah," said the Doctor, sitting back in his chair.
Jayne stood up abruptly, swearing in grammatically incomprehensible Chinese. "I'm sorry, but are you really buying this?" he demanded, looking at Mal. "He's a liar. I've always said he was a liar, back when he told us that big sob story about his sister, and now he's lying again. Toss them both off, let me shove that box out the airlock, and let's just go on our way."
The Doctor got to his feet. "Jayne? Come with me."
Jayne managed to take two big steps back and still look imposing.
"You've got a great big gun, and I'm unarmed. Come with me. Just for a few minutes."
He looked very, very suspicious, but he nodded.
Even if he did flip the safety off Vera.
The Doctor smiled. "Everyone else, just stay put." He gave Donna a pointed look.