FIC: Green Eyed Monster. Part 2/3 (SGA)
Dec. 2nd, 2009 09:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ashinaeGreen-Eyed Monster
by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ashinae and linden_jay
Pairing: Sheppard/McKay
Rating/Warnings: NC-17
Spoilers: None for any major plot points. Assumes you've watched the show. Set sometime before Season Four.
Disclaimer: Not written for profit.
Summary: John didn't like it. Not one bit. And nobody could make him.
Note: This is a multi-part, but complete, story. This is not a work in progress.
Previous Parts: Part One
Green-Eyed Monster: Part Two
It was late, and Rodney'd been working for hours, not even taking an actual meal break this time, just multitasking between working on the system and eating the food that Canoc had brought him. He was muttering to himself, leaning closer to the monitors and squinting at them.
"Are you getting tired, Doctor McKay?" Canoc asked, gently touching his shoulder. "It's late again, and you haven't stopped all day."
Rodney waved his hand absently. "Fine--I'm fine," he said, leaning closer and checking an equation again.
Carefully, Canoc took hold of Rodney and pulled him away from the screen. "Can you read that from here?"
"No, which is why I'm reading it from here," Rodney said deliberately, leaning closer again. Really. People asked the strangest questions.
"You need to rest," Canoc insisted.
"I'm close--I'm... I just need to finish this, because if I finish this, then the rest of it's going to make sense." Seven hours from then.
"And what difference will it make if you wait until morning?"
"It will make a difference because I'm this close," Rodney protested.
"And you will continue to be this close in the morning," Canoc insisted. "Please, come back with me, let me feed you properly, and put you to bed."
"I'll take him home."
Canoc looked behind him, startled, and then smiled. "Colonel Sheppard. I didn't hear you arrive."
"I guess not," John said. "Let me take Rodney home for a good night's rest in his own bed."
"You're both being ridiculous. I'm fine," Rodney protested. Maybe they'd argue and he could get some more work done.
"You're not fine," Canoc said. "You're exhausted, and you'll be able to do a much better job in the morning. Let me take you home."
"You should come back to Atlantis," said John, as though Canoc hadn't spoken at all. He stepped forward and reached out to take hold of Rodney's arm. "Come on. I'm taking you home."
"Colonel Sheppard," Canoc said, "Doctor McKay is still welcome in my home."
"Thanks, but no thanks," John said, not even looking at him, and giving Rodney a bit of a tug.
"Have either of you noticed that I'm working here?" Rodney said, managing a glare at both of them.
"Yes, you are, McKay, and you're going to wear yourself out and be of no use to anyone, and then you'll feel bad and yell at everybody to deflect, so it's best for you to come home and go to sleep." John tugged harder on Rodney's arm.
Rodney gave John an even bigger glare, then huffed and let him pull him along. "Fine. But only because I need more clothes, and I'm not letting Ronon go through my closet again."
"I think Ronon would appreciate that." John didn't let go of Rodney's arm, even as Canoc trailed along behind them. Jerk.
"Be sure to stop by my house when you arrive tomorrow, Doctor McKay," Canoc said. "I look forward to being able to continue to help you."
"Yeah, yeah, he'll see you tomorrow," John muttered as his hand tightened on Rodney's arm.
"Tomorrow--yes. I'll be here. Early," Rodney called back, almost tripping and falling when he tried to look over his shoulder and keep up with John. "Would you slow down? I don't have your freakishly long legs, you know."
"We've got to get back to Atlantis," John said.
"Yes, but right this second? Are we in a hurry? Are there wolves chasing us?" It was hard to believe, but Rodney got more sarcastic as he got tired.
"No," John said, "no wolves."
"Then slow down," Rodney said, balking like a stubborn Yorkie at the end of a leash. "I'm not tripping and breaking an ankle because you're in a rush to get back to being beat up with sticks or whatever you do to pass an evening."
"I'm putting you to bed and making sure you stay there for at least eight hours, maybe nine," John said.
"Oh, I really don't think that's going to happen," Rodney scoffed.
"Yeah, I really think it will," John countered.
"What are you going to do, post Ronon to stand guard outside my room?"
"No. That would be silly."
"Yes. It would," Rodney said, grateful that John appeared to be seeing sense.
"I'm just going to stay in your room."
Rodney started laughing, then trailed off when he realised that John didn't seem to be kidding. "Oh come on!"
"You're going to sleep, and you're going to like it."
"This... I'm sure this is in some way against the Geneva convention! You can't force me to sleep!"
"Yes, I can, and Carson's already agreed to help."
"Lies!"
John looked at him.
Rodney scowled deeply.
And John smiled. That was the Rodney he knew and--
Knew.
They stepped through the gate, John's hand still on Rodney's arm, and John marched him down to the infirmary. "Doc?"
"Ah, there you are," Carson said. "I was beginning to worry you couldn't get him away."
"I know how to sleep! This is completely unnecessary," Rodney protested, swatting at John and raising his finger threateningly at Carson. "You stay away from me!"
Carson picked up one little pill and a plastic cup of water. "Just take this," he said, as John shoved Rodney forward. "It'll help you sleep."
"I have work to do in the morning," Rodney complained. "If this hinders my productivity, or makes me sleep too long, or in any way compromises my work, you will only have yourselves to blame."
"It won't," Carson said, checking a sigh. "It'll just make it easier for you to fall asleep. That's all. It's a very small dose." Actually, it was a multi-vitamin, but neither Sheppard nor McKay needed to know that.
Rodney glared fiercely at both of them, then sighed dramatically, snatched the pill out of Carson's hand and swallowed it with water. "Happy now?"
"Yes." John turned him around and marched him back out of the infirmary, calling, "Thanks, Doc!" over his shoulder.
"Anytime, Colonel," Carson said.
"I hate you both!" Rodney called back.
"We know," said John. He led the way to Rodney's room. "So you're going to get a very good night's sleep, and if you really think you need to, you can go back to work in the morning after a hearty breakfast."
"What do you mean 'if I need to'?" Rodney repeated. "Of course I need to. I'm nearly there, John!"
"Yeah, well..." John opened Rodney's door and pushed him inside.
"You're being very stubborn, you know," Rodney said, ignoring the colour of his shiny black kettle.
"That's what I do." John made himself comfortable in a chair at Rodney's desk. "Go to bed."
"You're not staying here to watch me!" Rodney protested, hands on hips.
John was so not about to move.
"You have to sleep too, Colonel." Rodney folded his arms across his chest.
"I had a very nice nap this afternoon."
"This is harassment. I'm being harassed."
"Take it up with Elizabeth. In the morning. After sleep and breakfast." And then she'd probably chew John out, possibly for being weird, not likely for annoying Rodney, but it'd be worth it.
A long, dramatic sigh that must have pulled most of the oxygen from the room. "Turn around."
"What?"
"I have to get changed for bed, so turn around!"
John sighed a little, got to his feet, and turned around.
"Now don't turn back," Rodney scolded, getting his pyjamas from under the pillow and watching John for a few long moments before he dared to get changed.
John fidgeted. "Are you done yet?"
"I don't know if in the military you do drills to see who can get undressed and redressed the fastest, but in my field, it's not considered a competition."
John huffed. "Just hurry up and get to bed."
"This was your idea in the first place, so you'll just have to be patient," Rodney said, taking time to carefully fluff his pillow before he climbed into bed and pulled up the covers.
"Are you done yet?"
"Yes, yes, you can turn around again."
"Good." John made himself comfy in the chair again. "Now go to sleep, Rodney."
"I'm back in Atlantis now. I don't have to listen to you if I don't want to," Rodney muttered. But he was tired. That pill was kicking in fast. "If I can't work tomorrow because you nagged Carson into giving me drugs...."
"You'll be able to work. He promised me you would."
"I better," Rodney murmured. "You could go, you know. You don't have to stay."
"Yes, I do, because you're not going to be getting up at three in the morning to back."
"I wasn't going to do that!" And no, that wasn't Rodney's watch alarm being surreptitiously set under the covers.
John suddenly got up. "Give me your watch," he said.
"What? No," Rodney said, hiding his arm behind his back.
"Don't make me wrestle it off you, because you won't win," John said.
"Okay, now I know that's harassment."
"Give me your watch, Rodney."
Rodney practically pouted as he unbuckled his watch and handed it over.
"Thank you." John took the watch from him and went to sit down in the chair again.
"Good luck trying to figure out how to turn the alarm off," Rodney said smugly.
Beep. Beep. Beepbeep. "There we go." John shoved the watch in his pocket.
Rodney sat upright. "How did you do that?"
"Would you go to sleep already?"
"When did you turn into some kind of tech savant?"
John didn't answer. Maybe if he didn't say anything, Rodney would go to sleep.
Rodney lay down, and there was a few moments of quiet. "Did you watch me set it? Have you been spying on me?"
"Rod-nee."
"Fine! Did you ever think that maybe it's strange for me to try and sleep with you watching me? I can feel your eyes boring into the back of my skull."
John sighed. "Shut up and go to sleep."
A loud huff from Rodney, and he actually went quiet.
Finally. "Good night, Rodney."
"I'm telling Elizabeth in the morning." But at least Rodney sounded sleepy.
"Okay. You do that."
"I will."
"I'm sure."
A grunt from Rodney, and this time he stayed quiet.
Good. All right. John crossed his arms, stretched his legs out in front of him, and then he started the long, long wait until morning. He'd need to figure out some way to keep Rodney from going back to the planet.
*
It was about three in the morning. John kept nodding off, then waking up, then nodding off... the chair wasn't comfortable, and he intended to keep Rodney from sneaking out in the middle of the night to run back to Canoc. Stupid Canoc.
"Okay, that's just enough!"
John started. "Rodney! You're supposed to be asleep."
"Yes, well, that would be considerably easier if you weren't twitching and grunting and shifting about. You spend too much time with Ronon. You're picking up his mannerisms," Rodney complained.
"Shut up and go back to sleep."
"You shut up. I can't sleep if you're going to keep doing that."
John sighed. "Then I'll stop grunting."
"Are you tired?"
"It's three in the morning."
Rodney sighed. "Come here."
"What?"
"Just... you won't leave, right?" Rodney checked.
"What?"
"You aren't going to go back to your own room and get a good night's sleep on your own bed. Right?"
"No. I'm not. You've got to sleep."
"Then come over here, at least take your boots off, and lie down," Rodney said, squishing over to one side of his bed. "It's the only way we're going to sleep."
John stayed right where he was. "What?"
"I swear, if you don't I'm going to go out into the hallway and yell until someone goes and gets Elizabeth."
John grumbled. "Fine. Fine, whatever you want, Rodney." He untied his boots and then went to stand at the side of Rodney's bed.
Rodney snapped his fingers and pointed at the bed. "Lie. Down. And don't hog the covers. I catch cold easily if I'm chilled during the night."
John settled down on top of the blankets. "There."
He rolled his eyes, tugged the blankets out from underneath John, and flopped them on top of him. "There. Now will you be quiet?"
John grunted. "Go to sleep."
"Shut up. I'm trying."
"Good."
Rodney poked John in the ribs, and went still again.
John poked him back, then fell still, too.
*
When morning came, Rodney didn't wake up, not even when light came through the window. Of course, he was warm, and very comfortable, draped across John like he was Rodney's own personal mattress.
John stared up at the ceiling. This was very nice and very comfortable and so, so bad. His hand was on Rodney's upper back, while the other was down at his side clutching the sheets like a lifeline. Oh, this was all sorts of not good.
Rodney murmured, still sleeping, and wriggled against John, then sighed and went still again.
John swallowed hard. He moved carefully to check the time--it was still kind of early--they could stay in bed like this a while yet--Rodney was very warm--they could both use the rest--and of course, there was no Canoc here. At all. Ever. Which was how it should be.
Stupid Canoc and his stupid hair and stupid face.
Which, of course, was Rodney's cue to wake up, lashes fluttering and lips smacking as he blinked at John. "What time is it?" he demanded.
"About seven hundred."
Rodney struggled against the covers, wriggling against John and finally managing to crawl over him and out of bed. "I have to get going," he said, looking for his clothes.
"Oof," John said, as he got a knee in the gut. He sat up. "That wasn't nine hours of sleep, Rodney."
"Don't you dare." Rodney held out his hand and narrowed his eyes at John. "I came back, I took a sleeping pill, and I slept. That's as good as you're going to get, Colonel."
John sat up. "Rodney, I think you need to take a break."
"Oh please," Rodney snorted, looking around for his shoes.
"Rodney, I mean it."
"And when exactly is the last time you took shore leave or a vacation or so much as more than one day off in a row, hmm?"
"We're not talking about me," John said.
"We should. You're at least as bad," Rodney accused him.
"That's not the point, Rodney. You shouldn't go back there."
"Why not?"
"I don't trust Canoc."
"Oh, please," Rodney repeated, rolling his eyes. "You don't trust him? What's he going to do--polite someone to death?"
"Nothing here is ever what it appears to be, Rodney," John said. "Every time we meet someone who seems too good to be true, they really are."
Rodney turned back to John. "Teyla."
John blinked. "What about Teyla?"
"Everyone thought Teyla was too good to be true. But she wasn't, was she?"
John fidgeted. "She's Teyla."
"Exactly."
"So what are you saying?"
"That you have completely no logic whatsoever. Because she seemed too good to be true, and she wasn't. She was better," Rodney said.
"So are you saying Canoc's just like Teyla?"
"I'm saying that you're being ridiculous. And I think if you'd been the one to 'bond' with Canoc, you'd be looking at this completely differently. It's because it's me, and not you."
"What? That's ridiculous." John got to his feet.
"It's not. You're jealous."
"Jealous? Of you? Yeah, right, Rodney."
"Of him. You're jealous of him, because he's paying attention to me and not you," Rodney accused.
"I don't want him to pay attention to me! He's--he's--annoying."
"And you don't want him to be paying attention to me, do you?" Rodney said, pushing again, like an annoying little terrier.
"I don't trust him." John shoved one foot, and then the other, into his boots.
"Because you're jealous." Rodney's smirk was epic. "You. Are. Jealous. Admit it. Just admit that you're jealous, because it's got to be pretty obvious right now that I'm not going to quit."
"I'm not jealous," John snapped, looking down at the floor, as he tied his boots. "I'm going to go have breakfast."
"Then I'm going right back to the site," Rodney said. "If you're not jealous, you won't care."
"Fine," John said, bitchy as anything. "Go back. I don't care."
"Fine. I will. Since you don't care," Rodney snarked back.
"Good. You do that. Go." John stood up once his boots were laced up again, and stalked over to the door. At least he wouldn't have to see Canoc today.
"Jealous," Rodney called after him. "Jealous, jealous, jealous, jealous, jealous. Jealous."
"Shut up!" John snapped.
Breakfast. Right. Breakfast. Breakfast was a good idea. He made his way to the mess, and found Teyla, Ronon, Beckett, and Elizabeth all at a table together.
With Canoc.
He stopped dead in his tracks. No. Not here!
Teyla looked up from the table and smiled at John.
"Colonel Sheppard," Canoc called out, when he spotted him, "please, come join us. Teyla and Ronon helped me bring fruit for the people of Atlantis."
I hate you and your hair and your stupid face. "Sure, why not?" John strode across the mess and sat down next to Elizabeth, as far away from Canoc as he could manage.
"Canoc was just telling us about all the work that Rodney has been helping him with," Elizabeth said, taking a sip of her coffee. "It sounds like things are going very well."
"Yeah," John said, staring down the table at him. "Really well. We're lucky."
"We haven't seen Rodney yet this morning... hopefully he finally got some rest. It sounded like he's been doing his usual, burning the candle at both ends and in the middle," Elizabeth said, again going off information from Canoc.
"I do have my concerns," Canoc said. "I'd much rather see Doctor McKay healthy than working as fast as he possibly can to fix the devices the Ancestors left behind."
"Yeah, wouldn't we all," John said. "I think Rodney's somewhere behind me." Unless he was already on his way back to Traian. He scowled a little.
"Are you all right, Colonel Sheppard?" Teyla asked him. "You look tired."
John looked at her and shrugged a little. "I guess I didn't sleep all that well."
Canoc frowned. "I'm sorry to hear that, Colonel," he said.
Yeah, I'm just sure you are. "I'll be all right," John said.
Which was as good a cue as any for a freshly showered and shaved Rodney to show up at the mess, heading straight for the food line.
"I just remembered--I have a--" John got to his feet and all but ran away.
Canoc frowned. "Perhaps he needs to rest, Doctor Weir," he said, mildly.
Elizabeth managed a reassuring smile. "I'm sure he'll be fine, but the concern is appreciated," she assured him. Rest? Wasn't what John needed.
"His behaviour has been increasingly peculiar as the days pass," Canoc said. "Are you certain he's all right?"
"Perfectly certain," Elizabeth assured him. "Isn't that right, Doctor Beckett?" She didn't trust Ronon to lie.
Carson looked at her a moment, and then he said, "Oh. Absolutely. He's just fine."
Ronon snorted into his coffee. Quietly.
*
"Teyla radioed in to tell us that she and Ronon will return in a few hours, but Doctor McKay is going to stay on Traian," Chuck told Elizabeth, just outside her office. "Canoc has invited him to stay for dinner."
"Thank you, Chuck," Elizabeth said, smiling at him, and trying not to sigh when she realised that she was going to have to let John know. Waiting until Chuck had left, she touched her earpiece. "Colonel Sheppard?"
"Yes, Doctor Weir?" he responded.
"Teyla and Ronon will be returning to Atlantis in a few hours."
"I know."
"Then I suppose I don't have to report the rest of her message?" Elizabeth said.
He got up from the chair he was sitting in. At her desk. "Nope." He shoved his hands in his pockets. "What's kept you? I've been here for an hour and a half. I beat your top Minesweeper score, by the way."
She turned around and gave him a look. "You have an office, you know."
He looked sheepish. "Yeah, but I can't beat my own top score in Minesweeper."
"Are you sure it's yours? Major Lorne uses your office a lot," Elizabeth teased.
"Huh. That would explain a lot." John sat down in one of the chairs across from Elizabeth's desk. "So. Uh."
Elizabeth reclaimed her seat and looked back at John. "Yes?"
"Rodney. And Canoc. They're awfully... cosy." He turned away just a little, looking out the office window at operations.
"Rodney was remarkably polite to him during breakfast. After your... exit."
"I guess that makes up for my less-than-polite behaviour. Right?"
"Canoc thinks there's something wrong with you, so I'm so sure about that," Elizabeth said wryly.
John rubbed at his eyes. "Dammit."
"John. Look at me," Elizabeth said, voice gentle. "You don't really think there's something wrong with Canoc. Do you?"
John looked at her again. He fidgeted. "I don't like him."
"That isn't what I asked."
"No," he said.
"But you don't like that he's helping Rodney," Elizabeth said.
"No." He looked away again. "Not really."
"And... why do you think that is?"
His face is stupid. "Because I don't like him?"
"But why don't you like him?" Elizabeth pushed.
Because his face is stupid! John looked at her. "Do I really need to say this out loud?" he asked, plaintively.
"Well, if you don't want to say it to me, I'm sure we could find you some time with Doctor Heightmeyer," Elizabeth said, moving to stand up.
"I don't like Canoc because he likes Rodney," John blurted. He didn't want to talk to anybody else about this.
"Because he likes Rodney, or because you think he likes Rodney." Yes, running Atlantis was sometimes like running a middle school.
John looked up at the ceiling; he wasn't rolling his eyes, he just couldn't stand to look directly at Elizabeth right now. "The latter," he mumbled.
"And that bothers you because..."
"Because he has stupid hair?"
"I wonder how Doctor Heightmeyer's schedule is looking," Elizabeth murmured, turning toward her computer to check.
"I don't want to talk to Doctor Heightmeyer," John said in a small voice.
"Then you talk to me, because this is becoming a problem," Elizabeth said, putting on her I Am In Charge Of Running Atlantis voice.
John slouched down in his chair. "A problem?"
"When you start making people who are supposed to be our allies concerned about your medical or mental health? When you talk Carson into nagging Rodney into a sleeping pill? When you spend the night in his room, making sure he doesn't sneak out?"
"He, uh, told you about that, huh?" John rubbed at his face again.
"No. You just did," Elizabeth said.
John blinked. "No, I didn't."
"You just confirmed it. And I checked, because you've been strange lately."
"I'm not sure I'd use the word 'strange'," John protested.
Elizabeth raised one eyebrow. She and Teyla were both getting extremely good at that.
"Okay, I'd use the word strange. But I've got a good reason!"
"Which is?" Elizabeth prompted.
He looked away, up at the ceiling, down at her desk. I think he eats kittens and bathes in the blood of virgins at night? "He likes Rodney. A little too much. A lot too much."
"Assuming that's true, why should that be a problem?" Elizabeth asked.
"Because..." Because he saw Rodney first. Because he was jealous. Because nobody else was supposed to like Rodney, except maybe Ronon, Teyla, Elizabeth, Radek, and Carson. He looked helplessly at Elizabeth. Was she going to make him say this out loud? Really?
"I'll tell you what, John," Elizabeth said, leaning closer. "You don't have to tell me."
He looked utterly relieved.
"But you do have to tell Rodney."
"I do?"
"Yes. You do." Because between Rodney getting jealous of people paying too much attention to John, and John getting jealous of people paying too much attention to Rodney, Elizabeth was having to dye her hair way more often than should be necessary for a woman of her not-that-substantial age.
John sighed. "Maybe I do."
"Excellent. Now, if that's everything, I think I have some work to do?" And a Minesweeper top score to beat, damn John Sheppard anyway.
Part Three]
by
ashinae and linden_jayPairing: Sheppard/McKay
Rating/Warnings: NC-17
Spoilers: None for any major plot points. Assumes you've watched the show. Set sometime before Season Four.
Disclaimer: Not written for profit.
Summary: John didn't like it. Not one bit. And nobody could make him.
Note: This is a multi-part, but complete, story. This is not a work in progress.
Previous Parts: Part One
It was late, and Rodney'd been working for hours, not even taking an actual meal break this time, just multitasking between working on the system and eating the food that Canoc had brought him. He was muttering to himself, leaning closer to the monitors and squinting at them.
"Are you getting tired, Doctor McKay?" Canoc asked, gently touching his shoulder. "It's late again, and you haven't stopped all day."
Rodney waved his hand absently. "Fine--I'm fine," he said, leaning closer and checking an equation again.
Carefully, Canoc took hold of Rodney and pulled him away from the screen. "Can you read that from here?"
"No, which is why I'm reading it from here," Rodney said deliberately, leaning closer again. Really. People asked the strangest questions.
"You need to rest," Canoc insisted.
"I'm close--I'm... I just need to finish this, because if I finish this, then the rest of it's going to make sense." Seven hours from then.
"And what difference will it make if you wait until morning?"
"It will make a difference because I'm this close," Rodney protested.
"And you will continue to be this close in the morning," Canoc insisted. "Please, come back with me, let me feed you properly, and put you to bed."
"I'll take him home."
Canoc looked behind him, startled, and then smiled. "Colonel Sheppard. I didn't hear you arrive."
"I guess not," John said. "Let me take Rodney home for a good night's rest in his own bed."
"You're both being ridiculous. I'm fine," Rodney protested. Maybe they'd argue and he could get some more work done.
"You're not fine," Canoc said. "You're exhausted, and you'll be able to do a much better job in the morning. Let me take you home."
"You should come back to Atlantis," said John, as though Canoc hadn't spoken at all. He stepped forward and reached out to take hold of Rodney's arm. "Come on. I'm taking you home."
"Colonel Sheppard," Canoc said, "Doctor McKay is still welcome in my home."
"Thanks, but no thanks," John said, not even looking at him, and giving Rodney a bit of a tug.
"Have either of you noticed that I'm working here?" Rodney said, managing a glare at both of them.
"Yes, you are, McKay, and you're going to wear yourself out and be of no use to anyone, and then you'll feel bad and yell at everybody to deflect, so it's best for you to come home and go to sleep." John tugged harder on Rodney's arm.
Rodney gave John an even bigger glare, then huffed and let him pull him along. "Fine. But only because I need more clothes, and I'm not letting Ronon go through my closet again."
"I think Ronon would appreciate that." John didn't let go of Rodney's arm, even as Canoc trailed along behind them. Jerk.
"Be sure to stop by my house when you arrive tomorrow, Doctor McKay," Canoc said. "I look forward to being able to continue to help you."
"Yeah, yeah, he'll see you tomorrow," John muttered as his hand tightened on Rodney's arm.
"Tomorrow--yes. I'll be here. Early," Rodney called back, almost tripping and falling when he tried to look over his shoulder and keep up with John. "Would you slow down? I don't have your freakishly long legs, you know."
"We've got to get back to Atlantis," John said.
"Yes, but right this second? Are we in a hurry? Are there wolves chasing us?" It was hard to believe, but Rodney got more sarcastic as he got tired.
"No," John said, "no wolves."
"Then slow down," Rodney said, balking like a stubborn Yorkie at the end of a leash. "I'm not tripping and breaking an ankle because you're in a rush to get back to being beat up with sticks or whatever you do to pass an evening."
"I'm putting you to bed and making sure you stay there for at least eight hours, maybe nine," John said.
"Oh, I really don't think that's going to happen," Rodney scoffed.
"Yeah, I really think it will," John countered.
"What are you going to do, post Ronon to stand guard outside my room?"
"No. That would be silly."
"Yes. It would," Rodney said, grateful that John appeared to be seeing sense.
"I'm just going to stay in your room."
Rodney started laughing, then trailed off when he realised that John didn't seem to be kidding. "Oh come on!"
"You're going to sleep, and you're going to like it."
"This... I'm sure this is in some way against the Geneva convention! You can't force me to sleep!"
"Yes, I can, and Carson's already agreed to help."
"Lies!"
John looked at him.
Rodney scowled deeply.
And John smiled. That was the Rodney he knew and--
Knew.
They stepped through the gate, John's hand still on Rodney's arm, and John marched him down to the infirmary. "Doc?"
"Ah, there you are," Carson said. "I was beginning to worry you couldn't get him away."
"I know how to sleep! This is completely unnecessary," Rodney protested, swatting at John and raising his finger threateningly at Carson. "You stay away from me!"
Carson picked up one little pill and a plastic cup of water. "Just take this," he said, as John shoved Rodney forward. "It'll help you sleep."
"I have work to do in the morning," Rodney complained. "If this hinders my productivity, or makes me sleep too long, or in any way compromises my work, you will only have yourselves to blame."
"It won't," Carson said, checking a sigh. "It'll just make it easier for you to fall asleep. That's all. It's a very small dose." Actually, it was a multi-vitamin, but neither Sheppard nor McKay needed to know that.
Rodney glared fiercely at both of them, then sighed dramatically, snatched the pill out of Carson's hand and swallowed it with water. "Happy now?"
"Yes." John turned him around and marched him back out of the infirmary, calling, "Thanks, Doc!" over his shoulder.
"Anytime, Colonel," Carson said.
"I hate you both!" Rodney called back.
"We know," said John. He led the way to Rodney's room. "So you're going to get a very good night's sleep, and if you really think you need to, you can go back to work in the morning after a hearty breakfast."
"What do you mean 'if I need to'?" Rodney repeated. "Of course I need to. I'm nearly there, John!"
"Yeah, well..." John opened Rodney's door and pushed him inside.
"You're being very stubborn, you know," Rodney said, ignoring the colour of his shiny black kettle.
"That's what I do." John made himself comfortable in a chair at Rodney's desk. "Go to bed."
"You're not staying here to watch me!" Rodney protested, hands on hips.
John was so not about to move.
"You have to sleep too, Colonel." Rodney folded his arms across his chest.
"I had a very nice nap this afternoon."
"This is harassment. I'm being harassed."
"Take it up with Elizabeth. In the morning. After sleep and breakfast." And then she'd probably chew John out, possibly for being weird, not likely for annoying Rodney, but it'd be worth it.
A long, dramatic sigh that must have pulled most of the oxygen from the room. "Turn around."
"What?"
"I have to get changed for bed, so turn around!"
John sighed a little, got to his feet, and turned around.
"Now don't turn back," Rodney scolded, getting his pyjamas from under the pillow and watching John for a few long moments before he dared to get changed.
John fidgeted. "Are you done yet?"
"I don't know if in the military you do drills to see who can get undressed and redressed the fastest, but in my field, it's not considered a competition."
John huffed. "Just hurry up and get to bed."
"This was your idea in the first place, so you'll just have to be patient," Rodney said, taking time to carefully fluff his pillow before he climbed into bed and pulled up the covers.
"Are you done yet?"
"Yes, yes, you can turn around again."
"Good." John made himself comfy in the chair again. "Now go to sleep, Rodney."
"I'm back in Atlantis now. I don't have to listen to you if I don't want to," Rodney muttered. But he was tired. That pill was kicking in fast. "If I can't work tomorrow because you nagged Carson into giving me drugs...."
"You'll be able to work. He promised me you would."
"I better," Rodney murmured. "You could go, you know. You don't have to stay."
"Yes, I do, because you're not going to be getting up at three in the morning to back."
"I wasn't going to do that!" And no, that wasn't Rodney's watch alarm being surreptitiously set under the covers.
John suddenly got up. "Give me your watch," he said.
"What? No," Rodney said, hiding his arm behind his back.
"Don't make me wrestle it off you, because you won't win," John said.
"Okay, now I know that's harassment."
"Give me your watch, Rodney."
Rodney practically pouted as he unbuckled his watch and handed it over.
"Thank you." John took the watch from him and went to sit down in the chair again.
"Good luck trying to figure out how to turn the alarm off," Rodney said smugly.
Beep. Beep. Beepbeep. "There we go." John shoved the watch in his pocket.
Rodney sat upright. "How did you do that?"
"Would you go to sleep already?"
"When did you turn into some kind of tech savant?"
John didn't answer. Maybe if he didn't say anything, Rodney would go to sleep.
Rodney lay down, and there was a few moments of quiet. "Did you watch me set it? Have you been spying on me?"
"Rod-nee."
"Fine! Did you ever think that maybe it's strange for me to try and sleep with you watching me? I can feel your eyes boring into the back of my skull."
John sighed. "Shut up and go to sleep."
A loud huff from Rodney, and he actually went quiet.
Finally. "Good night, Rodney."
"I'm telling Elizabeth in the morning." But at least Rodney sounded sleepy.
"Okay. You do that."
"I will."
"I'm sure."
A grunt from Rodney, and this time he stayed quiet.
Good. All right. John crossed his arms, stretched his legs out in front of him, and then he started the long, long wait until morning. He'd need to figure out some way to keep Rodney from going back to the planet.
It was about three in the morning. John kept nodding off, then waking up, then nodding off... the chair wasn't comfortable, and he intended to keep Rodney from sneaking out in the middle of the night to run back to Canoc. Stupid Canoc.
"Okay, that's just enough!"
John started. "Rodney! You're supposed to be asleep."
"Yes, well, that would be considerably easier if you weren't twitching and grunting and shifting about. You spend too much time with Ronon. You're picking up his mannerisms," Rodney complained.
"Shut up and go back to sleep."
"You shut up. I can't sleep if you're going to keep doing that."
John sighed. "Then I'll stop grunting."
"Are you tired?"
"It's three in the morning."
Rodney sighed. "Come here."
"What?"
"Just... you won't leave, right?" Rodney checked.
"What?"
"You aren't going to go back to your own room and get a good night's sleep on your own bed. Right?"
"No. I'm not. You've got to sleep."
"Then come over here, at least take your boots off, and lie down," Rodney said, squishing over to one side of his bed. "It's the only way we're going to sleep."
John stayed right where he was. "What?"
"I swear, if you don't I'm going to go out into the hallway and yell until someone goes and gets Elizabeth."
John grumbled. "Fine. Fine, whatever you want, Rodney." He untied his boots and then went to stand at the side of Rodney's bed.
Rodney snapped his fingers and pointed at the bed. "Lie. Down. And don't hog the covers. I catch cold easily if I'm chilled during the night."
John settled down on top of the blankets. "There."
He rolled his eyes, tugged the blankets out from underneath John, and flopped them on top of him. "There. Now will you be quiet?"
John grunted. "Go to sleep."
"Shut up. I'm trying."
"Good."
Rodney poked John in the ribs, and went still again.
John poked him back, then fell still, too.
When morning came, Rodney didn't wake up, not even when light came through the window. Of course, he was warm, and very comfortable, draped across John like he was Rodney's own personal mattress.
John stared up at the ceiling. This was very nice and very comfortable and so, so bad. His hand was on Rodney's upper back, while the other was down at his side clutching the sheets like a lifeline. Oh, this was all sorts of not good.
Rodney murmured, still sleeping, and wriggled against John, then sighed and went still again.
John swallowed hard. He moved carefully to check the time--it was still kind of early--they could stay in bed like this a while yet--Rodney was very warm--they could both use the rest--and of course, there was no Canoc here. At all. Ever. Which was how it should be.
Stupid Canoc and his stupid hair and stupid face.
Which, of course, was Rodney's cue to wake up, lashes fluttering and lips smacking as he blinked at John. "What time is it?" he demanded.
"About seven hundred."
Rodney struggled against the covers, wriggling against John and finally managing to crawl over him and out of bed. "I have to get going," he said, looking for his clothes.
"Oof," John said, as he got a knee in the gut. He sat up. "That wasn't nine hours of sleep, Rodney."
"Don't you dare." Rodney held out his hand and narrowed his eyes at John. "I came back, I took a sleeping pill, and I slept. That's as good as you're going to get, Colonel."
John sat up. "Rodney, I think you need to take a break."
"Oh please," Rodney snorted, looking around for his shoes.
"Rodney, I mean it."
"And when exactly is the last time you took shore leave or a vacation or so much as more than one day off in a row, hmm?"
"We're not talking about me," John said.
"We should. You're at least as bad," Rodney accused him.
"That's not the point, Rodney. You shouldn't go back there."
"Why not?"
"I don't trust Canoc."
"Oh, please," Rodney repeated, rolling his eyes. "You don't trust him? What's he going to do--polite someone to death?"
"Nothing here is ever what it appears to be, Rodney," John said. "Every time we meet someone who seems too good to be true, they really are."
Rodney turned back to John. "Teyla."
John blinked. "What about Teyla?"
"Everyone thought Teyla was too good to be true. But she wasn't, was she?"
John fidgeted. "She's Teyla."
"Exactly."
"So what are you saying?"
"That you have completely no logic whatsoever. Because she seemed too good to be true, and she wasn't. She was better," Rodney said.
"So are you saying Canoc's just like Teyla?"
"I'm saying that you're being ridiculous. And I think if you'd been the one to 'bond' with Canoc, you'd be looking at this completely differently. It's because it's me, and not you."
"What? That's ridiculous." John got to his feet.
"It's not. You're jealous."
"Jealous? Of you? Yeah, right, Rodney."
"Of him. You're jealous of him, because he's paying attention to me and not you," Rodney accused.
"I don't want him to pay attention to me! He's--he's--annoying."
"And you don't want him to be paying attention to me, do you?" Rodney said, pushing again, like an annoying little terrier.
"I don't trust him." John shoved one foot, and then the other, into his boots.
"Because you're jealous." Rodney's smirk was epic. "You. Are. Jealous. Admit it. Just admit that you're jealous, because it's got to be pretty obvious right now that I'm not going to quit."
"I'm not jealous," John snapped, looking down at the floor, as he tied his boots. "I'm going to go have breakfast."
"Then I'm going right back to the site," Rodney said. "If you're not jealous, you won't care."
"Fine," John said, bitchy as anything. "Go back. I don't care."
"Fine. I will. Since you don't care," Rodney snarked back.
"Good. You do that. Go." John stood up once his boots were laced up again, and stalked over to the door. At least he wouldn't have to see Canoc today.
"Jealous," Rodney called after him. "Jealous, jealous, jealous, jealous, jealous. Jealous."
"Shut up!" John snapped.
Breakfast. Right. Breakfast. Breakfast was a good idea. He made his way to the mess, and found Teyla, Ronon, Beckett, and Elizabeth all at a table together.
With Canoc.
He stopped dead in his tracks. No. Not here!
Teyla looked up from the table and smiled at John.
"Colonel Sheppard," Canoc called out, when he spotted him, "please, come join us. Teyla and Ronon helped me bring fruit for the people of Atlantis."
I hate you and your hair and your stupid face. "Sure, why not?" John strode across the mess and sat down next to Elizabeth, as far away from Canoc as he could manage.
"Canoc was just telling us about all the work that Rodney has been helping him with," Elizabeth said, taking a sip of her coffee. "It sounds like things are going very well."
"Yeah," John said, staring down the table at him. "Really well. We're lucky."
"We haven't seen Rodney yet this morning... hopefully he finally got some rest. It sounded like he's been doing his usual, burning the candle at both ends and in the middle," Elizabeth said, again going off information from Canoc.
"I do have my concerns," Canoc said. "I'd much rather see Doctor McKay healthy than working as fast as he possibly can to fix the devices the Ancestors left behind."
"Yeah, wouldn't we all," John said. "I think Rodney's somewhere behind me." Unless he was already on his way back to Traian. He scowled a little.
"Are you all right, Colonel Sheppard?" Teyla asked him. "You look tired."
John looked at her and shrugged a little. "I guess I didn't sleep all that well."
Canoc frowned. "I'm sorry to hear that, Colonel," he said.
Yeah, I'm just sure you are. "I'll be all right," John said.
Which was as good a cue as any for a freshly showered and shaved Rodney to show up at the mess, heading straight for the food line.
"I just remembered--I have a--" John got to his feet and all but ran away.
Canoc frowned. "Perhaps he needs to rest, Doctor Weir," he said, mildly.
Elizabeth managed a reassuring smile. "I'm sure he'll be fine, but the concern is appreciated," she assured him. Rest? Wasn't what John needed.
"His behaviour has been increasingly peculiar as the days pass," Canoc said. "Are you certain he's all right?"
"Perfectly certain," Elizabeth assured him. "Isn't that right, Doctor Beckett?" She didn't trust Ronon to lie.
Carson looked at her a moment, and then he said, "Oh. Absolutely. He's just fine."
Ronon snorted into his coffee. Quietly.
"Teyla radioed in to tell us that she and Ronon will return in a few hours, but Doctor McKay is going to stay on Traian," Chuck told Elizabeth, just outside her office. "Canoc has invited him to stay for dinner."
"Thank you, Chuck," Elizabeth said, smiling at him, and trying not to sigh when she realised that she was going to have to let John know. Waiting until Chuck had left, she touched her earpiece. "Colonel Sheppard?"
"Yes, Doctor Weir?" he responded.
"Teyla and Ronon will be returning to Atlantis in a few hours."
"I know."
"Then I suppose I don't have to report the rest of her message?" Elizabeth said.
He got up from the chair he was sitting in. At her desk. "Nope." He shoved his hands in his pockets. "What's kept you? I've been here for an hour and a half. I beat your top Minesweeper score, by the way."
She turned around and gave him a look. "You have an office, you know."
He looked sheepish. "Yeah, but I can't beat my own top score in Minesweeper."
"Are you sure it's yours? Major Lorne uses your office a lot," Elizabeth teased.
"Huh. That would explain a lot." John sat down in one of the chairs across from Elizabeth's desk. "So. Uh."
Elizabeth reclaimed her seat and looked back at John. "Yes?"
"Rodney. And Canoc. They're awfully... cosy." He turned away just a little, looking out the office window at operations.
"Rodney was remarkably polite to him during breakfast. After your... exit."
"I guess that makes up for my less-than-polite behaviour. Right?"
"Canoc thinks there's something wrong with you, so I'm so sure about that," Elizabeth said wryly.
John rubbed at his eyes. "Dammit."
"John. Look at me," Elizabeth said, voice gentle. "You don't really think there's something wrong with Canoc. Do you?"
John looked at her again. He fidgeted. "I don't like him."
"That isn't what I asked."
"No," he said.
"But you don't like that he's helping Rodney," Elizabeth said.
"No." He looked away again. "Not really."
"And... why do you think that is?"
His face is stupid. "Because I don't like him?"
"But why don't you like him?" Elizabeth pushed.
Because his face is stupid! John looked at her. "Do I really need to say this out loud?" he asked, plaintively.
"Well, if you don't want to say it to me, I'm sure we could find you some time with Doctor Heightmeyer," Elizabeth said, moving to stand up.
"I don't like Canoc because he likes Rodney," John blurted. He didn't want to talk to anybody else about this.
"Because he likes Rodney, or because you think he likes Rodney." Yes, running Atlantis was sometimes like running a middle school.
John looked up at the ceiling; he wasn't rolling his eyes, he just couldn't stand to look directly at Elizabeth right now. "The latter," he mumbled.
"And that bothers you because..."
"Because he has stupid hair?"
"I wonder how Doctor Heightmeyer's schedule is looking," Elizabeth murmured, turning toward her computer to check.
"I don't want to talk to Doctor Heightmeyer," John said in a small voice.
"Then you talk to me, because this is becoming a problem," Elizabeth said, putting on her I Am In Charge Of Running Atlantis voice.
John slouched down in his chair. "A problem?"
"When you start making people who are supposed to be our allies concerned about your medical or mental health? When you talk Carson into nagging Rodney into a sleeping pill? When you spend the night in his room, making sure he doesn't sneak out?"
"He, uh, told you about that, huh?" John rubbed at his face again.
"No. You just did," Elizabeth said.
John blinked. "No, I didn't."
"You just confirmed it. And I checked, because you've been strange lately."
"I'm not sure I'd use the word 'strange'," John protested.
Elizabeth raised one eyebrow. She and Teyla were both getting extremely good at that.
"Okay, I'd use the word strange. But I've got a good reason!"
"Which is?" Elizabeth prompted.
He looked away, up at the ceiling, down at her desk. I think he eats kittens and bathes in the blood of virgins at night? "He likes Rodney. A little too much. A lot too much."
"Assuming that's true, why should that be a problem?" Elizabeth asked.
"Because..." Because he saw Rodney first. Because he was jealous. Because nobody else was supposed to like Rodney, except maybe Ronon, Teyla, Elizabeth, Radek, and Carson. He looked helplessly at Elizabeth. Was she going to make him say this out loud? Really?
"I'll tell you what, John," Elizabeth said, leaning closer. "You don't have to tell me."
He looked utterly relieved.
"But you do have to tell Rodney."
"I do?"
"Yes. You do." Because between Rodney getting jealous of people paying too much attention to John, and John getting jealous of people paying too much attention to Rodney, Elizabeth was having to dye her hair way more often than should be necessary for a woman of her not-that-substantial age.
John sighed. "Maybe I do."
"Excellent. Now, if that's everything, I think I have some work to do?" And a Minesweeper top score to beat, damn John Sheppard anyway.
Part Three]
