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Ten ways to tell Ashinae wrote or co-wrote something

Disclaimer: This is not a reflection on current and/or past co-writers. My feelings about my writing are my own and do not reflect at all on the talents of, or my opinion of the talents of, anyone I have written with, current or past. Experience tells me I need to say this. My apologies.

1. Em-dashes -- liek woah
2. Way too much dialogue
3. Contrived attempts at humour
4. One-word titles, or titles derived from songs
5. Telling, not showing. Woe.
6. Sentence fragments -- especially when they happen to be the sole contents of a paragraph
7. Lots of references to food and/or eating
8. It's kinky in some way
9. A lot of murmuring, whispering, repetition, shamelessness, repetition, describing someone's tone of voice, and repetition.
10. Mournful attempts at poetical prose.
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